Friday, 21 February 2014
A Magic Garden
This little gift and photo has meant so much to Tor and given me a little hope.
It must really be magic.
I will rewind back to the turn of the new year.
Unfortunately Tor was not able to see his Dad as much as we all would have like. There were many reasons for this but for all parties it is upsetting. Foremostly for Tor, obviously for his Dad and very much for myself.
No matter how angry or bitter any separated families get, it is my opinion so important that both parents and their families get time together. Yes, I would not be human not to be infuriated by behaviour that at that instance could be seen as shirking responsibility or being selfish, but that is at that instance, that was how we all felt at that time.
There has been great bounds forwards to enable Tor to spend quality time with his Daddy. He has had a few saturday afternoons of fun with him intermingled with missed visits and mistakes on what was already planned.
This week being half term and I was at work. Tor was at his fantastic holiday club which he absolutely loves and thrives in. I took the plunge and I offered the chance of an overnight visit with his Dad. Dad seized the chance with great enthusiasm which I was so happy about. It was organised for Tuesday night.
Now, if you ever have seen a little one's face when something they were looking forward too did not happen ,you will understand that I decided not to tell him about the planned sleep over with his Dad. I took him to holiday club as normal and the staff their were aware that he was going to be collected at lunch time but they were not to let Tor know.
About 11.30am and I am sat at work getting butterflies, but for some reason it was not through worry of him not being collected, it was because I was starting to doubt whether I had made the right choice in not telling Tor. What if he was so surprised he did not want to go? What if in his little mind he had decided that there was something specific he wished to do in the evening with me?
I was surprised at these feelings, as I had never had them before. Where had they come from? Is it because the last sleep over at his dads was before Christmas?
So I kept myself busy (which is not hard at work at the moment!) I called holiday club at just gone one and it was confirmed that he was collected and was a very happy boy.
I called Tor's dad after work. The conversation was relaxed, he had taken Tor for lunch and they were at a friends house for tea. Tor was watching Ben 10. Tor came on the phone.
Me - Hey Bubba, are you having a good time?
Tor - Hi Mummy, you didn't tell me Daddy was picking me up.
Me - Was it a nice surprise?
Tor - The best, Thanks Mummy, Daddy has got me a surprise when we go to his house.
Me - Ooh that sounds exciting!
Tor - ......................................(thats the silence when Ben 10 turned into Fourarms)
Tor - Bye Mummy, love you.
Relief, my boy was happy and sounded great. Tors Dad was happy and sounded relaxed. I was happy and got back to work.
Fast forward to the Thursday morning. Tor had come home wednesday night full of beans and very tired! So on our way to holiday club the following morning he started to tell me about the garden that Daddy had got him. It was magic, he had to build it then put salty water on it and in the morning the trees had blossom on them and the grass had little flowers. Tor was full of such enthusiasm about it.
Thursday afternoon and I received a text message. It was a message from Tors Dad. No words just a photo. He had taken a photo of the garden that they had made together. It made me smile.
As soon as I collected Tor from holiday club. I showed him the picture. He was near crying from happiness. He was so pleased that his garden has grown some more. Then he said..
"My Daddy remembered me Mummy, he remembered that that is our garden, he sent me that picture just for me."